Satou Hiroshi

"That's Hiroshi Satou, the guy I respect most in this school."

- Kusuo about Hiroshi

Hiroshi Satou (佐藤 広, さとう ひろし lit. Satou Hiroshi) is from the same class as Reita. He is the epitome of an ultimate normal guy, everything that Kusuo has ever wanted to be. Hiroshi was first introduced as someone who gets the same rank in school as Kusuo. Someone who has boring name, common appearance, average in brains and body and has no single quality to stand out. He blends into the background, so the other characters tend to lose sight of him. Hiroshi has his own circle of friends: a chubby guy and a skinny glasses guy.

He is completely average in everything he does. His grades, height, and weight are exactly average. Down to the millisecond, Hiroshi is timed to have the exact average times for the PE evaluation. He is also noted to go to the bathroom for the average amount of time and use the average amount of toilet paper.

Background
Hiroshi is from a family of four, his father is a salaryman who makes 4 million yen a year and his mother is a housewife. He has a younger brother who goes to a swimming school. He is described as a person with a normal common sense.

History
Kusuo seeks Hiroshi out after both of them get the exact average rank in the school multiple times in a row. He is found reading a book at his desk. He then has a conversation with his two friends about what each had for breakfast. Kusuo is very excited by how ordinary it all is, complimenting Hiroshi by saying that he is "blandness personified." When Hiroshi is confronted by a con-artist claiming the boy broke his shoulder, he attempts to beg forgiveness. When this doesn't work, Kusuo secretly steps in and saves Hiroshi.

Kusuo is extremely fascinated by Hiroshi and begins stalking him around the school. Both Kusuo and Reita are watching when Hiroshi passes Riki in the hallway, but since nothing happens, Reita throws an eraser at the back of Riki's head. Riki blames this on Hiroshi and begins to shout at him. Hiroshi is immediately startled by Riki's butt chin and weird haircut and tries to explain that he didn't throw the eraser using logic. This doesn't work, and Kusuo concludes that Hiroshi only has two options to proceed. However, Hiroshi surprises Kusuo by choosing a perfect combination of the two options that allowed him to get out of the situation.

Kusuo decides that he wants to be Hiroshi's friend and attempts to draw the latter's attention by doing things Hiroshi likes. Hiroshi observes these actions and thinks that he should go and talk to Kusuo, but decides not to, saying that the two of them had never talked before and that Kusuo seemed a little strange. This does not affect Kusuo's interest in Hiroshi.

Abilities

 * Normalcy: Hiroshi was first introduced as someone who gets the same rank in school as Kusuo, someone who has a boring name, common appearance, averageness in brains and body and no single quality to stand out. He blends into the background, and he is completely average in everything he does. His normalness can even nullify the bizarre bad luck caused by Suzumiya Hii.

Trivia

 * “Hiroshi Sato”, the name from which his full name is derived, can be considered the equivalent of “John Smith” in Japanese.
 * He likes peach tea and reading Jump.
 * His favorite celebrity is Kanna Hashimoto.
 * His hobbies include reading books and playing games.
 * His favorite band is ONE OK ROCK